The novel “Redeeming Love” may be the worst book I have ever read since “Catcher in the Rye” and almost equal in its lack of substance. In fact, it is so bad that I’m going to spend the last weekend I have before my fall semester of college kicks off making this review in order to prove to you by logic and reason why this book is not necessary to either Christians or non-Christians.
What made this come about? Why is Colton Royle all of a sudden becoming such a big jerk and exposing the sham of Redeeming Love? In my teenage to college years, there have been two primary novels in women’s lives that I’ve heard of time and time again: Twilight and Redeeming Love. Twilight with its well known vampire and werewolf spiel has left adult males flabbergasted and tongue tied. It’s so popular, that many men have posted their opinion through YouTube, web blogs, and news articles in an attempt to destroy a dangerous fad. Bella with her “clumsiness” and not much else is left to this “Edward” guy and as much as I’d really like to talk about it, it’s all been said already. Redeeming Love flies well under radar. However, do not mistake its cloak and dagger approach. If a Christian woman finds no interest in Twilight, it’s because she’s read Redeeming Love, or is eventually going to read Redeeming Love. These two books have caused men to fight a losing battle. Although fiction is supposed to present something that “should” exist, women everywhere have taken these novels too close to heart and have decreed these books as a code to their male search engine. This I cannot and will not stand for in any respect. I’m fighting right now for all the men out there who tear their hair out because their woman wants them to be “Michael Hosea”.
Chapter 1: The Theme and Setting
“Redeeming Love is a historical romance novel set in the 1850s Gold Rush in California. The story is inspired by the book of Hosea from the Bible. Its central theme is to portray the redeeming love of God towards sinners.” And here is where 99% of the problem between reader and author enters the scene. It may even be where the author and the author screwed up. Here, in the theme alone we are paired with two completely separate types of love. The unconditional love of God towards us, sinners, in our constant quest for deserving heaven, and the romantic love of men and women in marriage. What I’m walking here is a difficult path because to step on the toes of Redeeming Love is to step on the toes of the book of Hosea, which is in the Bible. But sometimes I wonder how Francine Rivers interpreted the book of Hosea. In the book of Hosea, the Lord orders Hosea to “marry a prostitute” in order to show Israel’s lack of faith to God and their stubborn idol worship. What was the purpose of Michael Hosea marrying Sarah? In Redeeming Love, there is no overwhelming theme of a country’s betrayal and cascading violence and terror overrunning every aspect of existence. No, this is America, in the California Gold Rush of the 1850s. Francine Rivers makes the fundamental mistake that every History major becomes aware of at some point in time. She attempts to literally copy and paste from the Bible, not to mention a part dating 715 B.C. and place it approximately 1,135 years later into America. There was no sweeping parallel that caused thousands to repent. Michael and Sarah married and had children miraculously and then died. Removing the story from its historical context just makes this another love story, and with that, a very bad love story.
Chapter 2: The Characters
Oh boy. It’s incredible what a limiting environment Francine Rivers has placed herself in by recreating Hosea. I wonder why she would ever do that, but then again I’m just a dumb man so I wouldn’t really understand the gears that make up her goals and desires with this book. So here’s Michael Hosea, he’s big and strong and handsome, and he carries a bunch of things. I literally read several moments when he’s carrying crates of random things everywhere. In fact, you could say he fit’s the strong silent archetype, but then you would second guess that because of his ramblings to Angel later on in the story. Michael Hosea is, fundamentally a self-made Christian man. It is seen early on that he earns his wages fairly and never takes cheap deals or tries to cut corners. Until God tells him to marry Sarah, Michael Hosea seems to be living a good full life. Of course his tragic flaw is that he is stubborn. While that’s not a flaw to some it is definitely as setback for me. Later on I will detail his character in more specific terms. And now we have Sarah, Angel, Amanda, Fantine, Pretty Woman, etc. etc. This woman of many names is probably the reason why this review is being produced. I have every reason and every right to dislike everything about this woman. Do not say she is Israel, because in the 1850s Israel did not even exist as a geographical identity, and Jews were spread out world wide. The problem with Gomer/Sarah/Israel, is that every woman who has read Redeeming Love places their lives, once again, out of the context of their own existence and into hers. Maybe there isn’t a problem with this. Maybe it’s okay for women to do this, after all, it is a love story and that’s what is great about love stories is seeing how you would react differently in situations. It also allows for great conflict because what you decide is most of the time is not what they decide. Unfortunately, you’re wrong in this case, and I can prove it by very simple questions: Are you a prostitute? Were you born roughly before 1850 which could possibly place you in a teenage age at the time of Hosea‘s arrival? Have you had parents who both not wanted you? The last one could actually be possible but highly unlikely. The answer will be no, no you haven’t. The reason why we like the OC and soap operas and sitcoms is because they present us with our time line and our culture and it allows us to form our own sub-plots in our minds of how we react to them. Women who read Redeeming Love and don’t understand its true meaning seem to want a Michael Hosea to sweep them off their feet. But are they prostitutes? No they are not. Do not try to give me some stupid, “they’re a spiritual prostitute because they follow the pop-culture that’s destroying women today” They are not even that. If they are looking for a Michael Hosea, then they are no longer Sarah. They are a hybrid of some form sticking to the prostitution part but adhering to the hope one day that some hero will come by and drop that crate of whatever for their soul. I’ve got some very bad news ladies. Very bad indeed. Paul is a friend of Michael Hosea’s and puts off a very cynical and troubled nature in life. Immediately after seeing Angel with Michael, he immediately thinks how a prostitute could trick his best friend into marrying her. Until chapter 32, Paul is vehemently against Angel, which seems logical enough. How in the world could strong sensible Michael be duped by this poor excuse of a lady? Who knows, but Paul later in the novel is conflicted with a woman named Miriam. Miriam is a pretty cool cat who makes good decisions and is good looking and tender blah blah blah. Paul obviously assumes that Miriam was meant for Michael and constantly waits for Michael to get his butt in gear, but it never happens. He also likes to run away from his problems. Miriam, like we said is cool and whatever. Basically this is the girl apparently Michael should’ve married, but divine providence decreed otherwise. She doesn’t matter so much except to add some form of plot in the middle.
Chapter 3: The Plot
If there is one thing about this book that Francine Rivers totally failed on, it’s plot. Now that we’ve concluded that this tale is loosely, and I mean loosey goosey based on the book of Hosea, we can confirm it to be in the realm of soap operas and even trashy paperbacks. Francine Rivers is a writer? I felt myself asking that every time I read a single sentence of this monotonous manuscript. It becomes clear after the prologue that Francine Rivers has no idea how to stylishly form action, reaction, and character dialogue and scenes. Redeeming Love is a bad book, but it rides on the expectation from people that, “oh it’s adapted from the bible, so we should obviously pay attention way too much”. Then it attempts to suck you in on a pathetic love story much like Twilight with no plot arcs, terrible twists, and one dimensional characterization. Don’t act like this is the best love story ever told, because it isn’t. I as a man can tell you a love story that is much more plot oriented, has much more at stake, and with that, has a much greater conclusion.
The Beauty and the Beast
The Beauty and the Beast is without a doubt my favorite Disney classic, and I’m here to tell you why. In all of the Disney princess realm movies, Belle as the heroic woman is the only one that can honest to god read. We realize this when she’s at the library, flying across bookshelves to retrieve a favorite. The librarian is so dumbfounded by her undying intelligent curiosity that she gets to keep the story, which if you listen carefully sets the stage for the entire arc of the film. Belle is frustrated, but it’s not anything easily seen. It is a spiritual or ambitious conflict. Belle has read so much that she concludes the little town is not enough to support her plans for world domination. Belle loves life so much that she wants to experience it in full form, which she cannot be do in her current location. We already know in the first ten minutes, not only of the prince’s predicament for not giving an enchantress a place to stay, but also of Belle as a character, and her spiritual predicament. When her father’s prize wood cutting machine finally works, he takes the opportunity to take it to a fair or something in order to sell it or patent it or what not. So he leaves, takes a wrong turn, gets attacked by wolves, and lands in the hideous gothic castle in the hope of receiving shelter. Obvious parallel structure sets in, but this time the Beast is filled with bitterness. He holds him prisoner, instead of killing him, which makes more since but since this is Disney…whatever. Holding him prisoner causes his trusty steed to run back to Belle and scream, “your father’s trapped in that crazy castle”. And Belle goes, “damn girl let’s GO!” But here is where the beauty, no pun intended, of the movie really kicks in. After her escapade with Gaston in her town she finally sets off on the adventure she dreamed of, but she doesn’t recognize it because of the peril her father finds himself in. Belle storms the castle and finds her father only to discover the town rumors are true and a terrifying monster inhabits it. Belle is filled with fear, but the conflict is present. In a clear assessment of her values, she decides to sacrifice everything she wanted in her exciting life for the freedom of her father. The beast accepts and throws the father back to his original housing. Of course you know the rest, and Belle, realizing how much Beast cared for her by fighting Gaston on the castle top, dedicates her love to him, which breaks the bond just in time, and makes for a crying Colton. What makes Beauty and the Beast so great is its conflict. So much is at stake. The Beast undergoes an entire personality switch in order to prove his affection to Belle and reverse the spell before it’s all too late. Gaston is so overly ambitious that he wants the one woman he can’t have, and will do anything, including turn the town into a riot to have Belle as his wife. Belle is so overcome with grief at the beginning that she argues with furniture about not wanting to have anything to do with Beast. She has no reason to love him, but over the course of an hour and so minutes, grows to care for him unlike anyone else in the world. Both characters undergo drastic changes and grow in spirit, and we get to experience them together.
Knowing what a good love story is like, let’s try and break down the plot in Redeeming Love. There’s this girl named Sarah. Sarah is the child of Mae who is having an affair with a man named Alex Stafford. Instead of getting an abortion, Mae has Sarah which really puts off Alex. Alex abandons any thought of marrying Mae, and Mae turns to prostitution. Mae dies of illness five years later and Sarah gets bounced around to different owners and then eventually she takes up the role or prostitution herself, because she doesn’t consider herself worthy of any meaningful expression. And of course, the fascination of the “hooker with a heart of gold” cliché. Although Sarah doesn’t quite fall into this category, we can still contribute this cliché as merely part of an odd cultural tendency. It’s one of the most overused topics in every art form. I’m not kidding when I say this either. Here’s a list. I could type it out, but why when there is an extensive explanation here:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hooker_with_a_heart_of_gold
So through some hand offs and fights, Sarah loses all hope of love in a concrete form and succumbs to a guilty existence and starts prostitution with The Duke but gets handed over by, you guessed it, The Duchess. Really? Pimps and whore owners have great name pairings?
This is the point in the story where Michael Hosea enters the scene. Obviously written by a two year old, Hosea is carrying vegetables and shootin’ the shit with colleagues when Angel rolls by. She’s a high end prostitute, and it’s a high price that’s called for one to meet her. Michael is suddenly struck with the voice of God saying quote, “this one, beloved”. Which one? Michael seems to know exactly what God means and spends that moment on worrying about nothing else than meeting her. Hosea’s friends mention that she’s a prostitute, but Michael sees this as irrelevant. God’s word is final right?
Michael Hosea invests a good amount of money into getting one opportunity to see her. Michael and Angel meet for the first time, and Michael does not lay a hand on her and does not want sex but instead offers Angel a chance to run away with him, get married, blah blah blah
If this was the real book of Hosea, God would’ve ordered Hosea to marry Gomer, and Gomer would marry him without asking twice, because that’s how it happened. Not only that, but she produced children like an assembly line after that. I can’t help thinking how love ever got into this equation. Gomer married him regardless of it, either because she didn’t take it into account, or history did not because of its lack of importance. Suddenly when Francine Rivers writes Hosea, there’s a whole other aspect of “I can’t go with him because I don’t deserve love, and he’s just the same as everyone else”, when he made it very clear the first time that he wasn’t like everyone else. Angel hears but doesn’t listen. She’s been looking for a way out, here it is, and she flatly ignores it. Remember this isn’t God, this is Michael Hosea, pure human, with no power to give her salvation, yet this is supposed to be a God/Israel pairing. Michael leaves empty…uh…handed I guess? He’s upset but he recognizes God’s orders. He repeatedly visits her offering her the same ultimatum: to leave with him and live a good full life. It gets to be so frequent, the other prostitutes become jealous that some hot stud visits so often. Maybe it’s because they are smarter than Angel and recognize a good thing when they see it. But Angel seems to live a sad existence of bad and less bad policy. You may not be bad now, but eventually you’ll screw up, and I’ll be right. She twiddles her thumbs and sends out Michael each time. Michael has enough gold for one last attempt. Michael is frustrated, and has every right to be. But here is where the book falls apart. Sure I could’ve given you the benefit of the doubt that up until now, the book was morally satisfying and had a crushing introduction of peril that could lead to some form of redemption, but I won’t. This is where it all proves worthless and here’s why. Michael Hosea’s mission to marry Angel is not of his own free will, but instead a direct order from God. Jonah tried to disobey God’s orders and look where that got him. All conflict in this story is now destroyed, and from here on is where the book was a mind-boggling bore to me. What makes Beauty and the Beast a great movie is at anytime Belle could’ve become angry and left Beast, and it would’ve proved disastrous for him. Beast could’ve thrown out Belle, and Belle wouldn’t know anything about the spell and the handsome man behind the terror. In all likelihood, Belle would’ve had to survive or repel a marriage with Gaston, which Belle’s father approved! But not Redeeming Love. From then on, I knew the outcome of the whole story. God’s order transcended the fictional free-will framework that people read fiction for in the first place! Does that make any sense? Now the rest of the book plays out this long dramatic story, and everyone is surprised at the conclusion. I was never surprised, and I was never on the edge of my seat, which makes for a god-awful narrative, no pun intended. So now we know how it ends (SPOILERS!), he goes back for one last meeting.Angel gives Michael the same treatment. It was a last ditch attempt that fails, and Michael has no choice but to return home. But apparently a seed has been planted. Angel, the woman with the 1,000 walls starts to be discontented and thinks about Hosea constantly. But she doesn’t often consider running away with him because, oh BTW she left with a guy before and he was a total jerk. So if A=B, then Michael Hosea = Johnny, or some logic crap like that. It’s tough for me to consider her using analogies and logic when her whole life is built on the opposite. By chapter 6, Michael, who has left Angel temporarily (God-FreeWill Paradox), starts to have crazy nightmares. Michael Hosea agrees to himself that he will attempt to see her one more time, and then the dreams vanish and he can sleep. When he arrives back to Pair-A-Dice (my favorite part of the book was this name), he finds Angel beaten almost to death by Magowan, a bodyguard of the Duchess. Michael has really bad timing and utters, “marry me?” Angel utters back, “why not?” Doctor Michael brings Angel back to his cabin and nurses her back to health. Angel treats Michael like some prison guard and is barely tolerable in the whole ordeal. Michael becomes “mysterious” in that he attends to her every physical need but then allows her tranquility and time alone to think her thoughts. In all likelihood he was looking for some fresh air because of her intolerance. More romantic things ensue like a property tour, but only because she is bored of being inside. She still has no real interest in Hosea, or does she? Michael gets all Jimmy Stewart from It’s a Wonderful Life and states his lifetime goals about his property. Angel feels a little overwhelmed and tragically informs him that she has no part in this and doesn’t want one. She learns some chores, then suddenly lights her skirt on fire. Frustrated, she yells at Michael, the closest human in range. This would be another great time for him to reconsider this arrangement, but oh wait, never mind. Paul arrives! Finally some sense into this place. Paul comes back after a fruitless search for gold and is introduced to Angel who he recognizes as the high end hooker. Paul tries to explain this to Michael but only angers him. Paul feels as though Angel has deceived Michael into marriage, and so begins the soap opera moment of the middle valley of this novel.
Angel soon becomes worried when she cannot find Hosea. After the fire fiasco, Angel is confident that Hosea is working out a punishment for such stupidity. Since he’s perfect obviously he’s not. The lack of justice on any of Angel’s actions is so lacking it makes me wonder what kind of God Francine Rivers believes in. God has been known numerous times to be a just God. So then she busies herself by MAKING ANOTHER FIRE. Her failure to create one leads Michael to emerge from his hiding spot (he was observing her, like Planet Earth without the British commentator). Michael tries to teach her, but Angel’s frustration at her lack of ability, and Michael’s calm instruction (?) cause her to tense up. But then Angel asks him to rub her shoulders. Michael obeys, which makes a lot of sense.
Angel begins to have nightmares about the Duke approaching her and Michael makes every attempt to calm her. “I will never be free of him” she says. Michael is a little upset that she won’t let him into her soul, but of course she will eventually. Michael takes Angel on a long dark walk. Angel at first is clinging to Hosea because of her fear of the dark because of the recent nightmares. Then Angel sees her first sunrise ever, because the sun doesn’t rise all that often, but because they walked before, suddenly she is awestruck. Michael then explains his relationship thesis. He wants to “fill her life with lots of color“, like Wizard of Oz or Pleasantville. Angel is beginning to enjoy her time at the cabin. Pair-a-Dice is always on her mind and she vows to return to settle unfinished business but Michael doesn’t plan on going back. She is still dumbstruck by his kind heart. Eventually fully healed, Angel runs in an attempt to get her money back from the Duchess. How on earth she planned to accomplish that is beyond me. Angel finds the Duchess gone, and Lucky and the old establishment burnt to the ground. And instead of returning to Michael, she does the sensible thing and starts her hooker work for a bartender in the Silver Dollar! She reasons it by saying that Paul was such a jerk and she’d rather sell her body than take the gossip of that man. It doesn’t take long before superman Hosea bursts through the saloon doors like John Wayne and fights to win her back, which he does. On the wagon ride back, Angel deals with guilt again, and wonders if Michael will ever love her again. Michael is doubtful he could ever love her again, but it’s irrelevant. Where there might have been any hope of rising action only leaves a stale taste in the mouth as no matter what he thinks he cannot leave the perimeter of his own mission. This is the part where Angel opens up to Michael and tells her great little life story, kind of like a testimony, but this is also irrelevant. It makes Michael feel good, but only seeks to blind out any hope of Michael truly making this decision on his own. He grimaces but bears through the difficult things to hear from Angel’s life story. Michael on the next Sunday attempts to take Angel to church only to leave before it is finished. Angel complains that she couldn’t believe in a God because of what emotional conflicts have happened in her life. Because somewhere in her view of God she placed the verse in the Bible that reads, “and God then said, ‘Life is fair to all’”. Instead of Michael saying that no where in the Bible does it say, “life is fair”, he sympathizes or whatever. On the way back from church, they encounter the Altman family, who have a flat tire. Michael fixes it in a jippy and we are all introduced to Miriam, a wrench in this train wreck of a toolbox. If it wasn’t a stupid drama now, it’s really going to be.
The dramatic valley I discussed goes in full swing now. Miriam likes Paul, and Paul likes Miriam, but Paul feels like Miriam belongs to Michael. Paul does not like Angel, but likes his friend Michael enough to sacrifice his crush on Miriam to have them marry. Angel likes Miriam, and since she now realizes she can’t have kids, she is okay with Miriam and Michael loving each other. I don’t remember if Miriam had feelings for Michael, but it’s entirely possible. I don’t know if Michael loves Angel or if he’s “just following orders”, or if he secretly loves Miriam. Miriam likes Paul, but seems to be okay getting thrown around.
See what I mean? As a result, I feel like this was a purposeful wrench in the story to get the second act moving. It’s perfectly possible. Angel had already run away and come back. Angel’s past was destroyed in fire. Michael was finally taking her to church. True spiritual formation was beginning. But then Rivers thought it wasn’t long enough or something. The Altman family literally appears with a broken wagon wheel, and now we know Miriam. Miriam is young and pure and nice. Angel is young, but impure and cold. Miriam becomes the new girl at school, and Angel is perfectly contented with this, removing any tension entirely. Paul likes Miriam but is willing to let Michael marry her? Miriam seems to be everything everyone wants, but Michael has made his “decision.” And finally the plot point that begins the “climax” of this whole ordeal. Miriam can produce babies, and Angel cannot. Angel reveals this and of course Michael is whatever about it. Angel begins to feel a love for Michael which Paul cannot stand. I’m really starting to skim the plot details and I apologize but the book gets blurry here. Elizabeth goes into labor, because she’s been pregnant, and Angel receives words from God but goes on a worship Hosea trend instead. What I want to talk about instead is the climax. In my opinion the climax is when Angel leaves AGAIN and goes to San Francisco. This time she leaves because of her guilt for Michael loving her, because she feels like she doesn’t deserve to be loved. What starts as a cooking job for Angel becomes the Duke wrestling her back to her past, then turns into a man named Jonathan Axle taking her away, and then she begins crying out to God. She has a mid-life crisis and opens up a prostitute help service. At least some form of redemption is found here. To make a long story short, eventually Miriam and Paul marry, and Angel returns to Michael Hosea. Despite abortions destroying Sarah’s reproductive state, they manage to dish out four children. They lived happily ever after. Yes I know I completely wrecked on details of the end, but I don’t want to get details flat out wrong. Towards the end I was flipping pages without reading them but I had seen what I already knew.
Chapter 4: The result
So what is the result of this plot, these characters, and the overall historical parallel? One thing I absolutely cannot stand is the cover of the book. The cover I see is a Victorian looking woman dressed up in some red dress that reminds me of Pride and Prejudice. If Pride and Prejudice was a Chicago styled pizza, Redeeming Love is Chuck e Cheese. Here is a description of Redeeming Love from Francine River’s official website (oh yes, she has her own website).
“Then she meets Michael Hosea. A man who seeks his Father’s heart in everything, Michael Hosea obeys God’s call to marry Angel and to love her unconditionally. Slowly, day by day, he defies Angel’s every bitter expectations until, despite her resistance her frozen heart begins to thaw. But with her unexpected softening comes overwhelming unworthiness and fear. And so Angel runs. Back to the darkness away from her husband’s pursuing love, terrified of the truth she can no longer deny: Her final healing must come from the One who loves her even more than Michael Hosea does…the One who will never let her go. A life-changing story of God’s unconditional, redemptive, all-consuming love. Over 1 million copies sold!”
Sounds good right? Unfortunately I’m not quite done and have a few final points that must be taken into account.
1) Angel’s overwhelming guilt
One aspect of Angel’s life that surrounds her more than any other is the thought of guilt and the process by which it controls her life. Realizing she wasn’t meant to be born is one. In my opinion this makes the least sense because she blatantly exists, right then, when she makes the comment of not meaning to exist. Backwards as it is she adamantly believes it. She feels guilt when Hosea “loves” her. She cannot accept that anyone could show affection for her and instead of letting it out and embracing a brighter future, she leaves again! What happened if she experienced no guilt? What happened if she fully expected to have Michael Hosea show up at the door? That is the hybrid woman we see today. I can run and be crazy, but eventually a man will find me and will carry my burdens.
2) Michael Hosea is an unnecessary puppet.
Think about this: why would God tell Michael Hosea to love and marry Angel to show his undying love for her when he could do that himself? Literally picture Hosea as a puppet with God the master up above moving him around. There’s no strings to Angel, but he can see her lying there on the floor in a guilt filled tornado. He could literally just yell, “I love you!” from any church, nice family, etc. But instead God tells Michael Hosea to be some sort of middle man and have his life crushed by Angel repeatedly. Of course this point is hard to defend because it really is not up to me who God uses to bring people to him, but it really hurts me to see Michael Hosea treated like that.
3) Redeeming Love is the middle man to the Bible
Speaking of middle men, I guess the biggest conclusion to this whole escapade is this: Redeeming Love shows practically nothing of Redeeming Love and if you want to experience this in its truest form, you should open up your Bible to the Gospel and understand the fundamental difference in what Jesus really meant, and why Francine Rivers is trying to make a quick buck.
4) I am just a middle man to Michael Hosea
And the ultimate point of why I would write so much on such a menial topic is here. They are all right. All men do suck when compared to Michael Hosea. Everything unconditional about Michael I would’ve discarded a long time ago. I am not that stubborn, and I refuse to live in such a filthy state as to let some hooker walk all over me. When looking for a Godly man, women need to grow up and face the fact that there is no such man as Michael Hosea. Michael Hosea is some half breed between God himself and a human transcendent individual. If a woman were to behave like this to any man, eventually the balance on his heart would read “account overdrawn”. The point was that God never runs out on his bank account of love and devotion to our souls and lives. Mine does. I’m sorry you had to hear it this way, but I’m right. Sure I might have messed up on some late plot points and maybe as a man I don’t understand how to read Redeeming Love. It seems to me Michael Hosea is a way out of responsibility for women. If a man is willing to let go of all the problems involved in a relationship like this, then a woman’s power is unprecedented. There are consequences for mistakes and everyone, including me, will answer to them.
Conclusion: In the end, does this really matter? Am I really going to change the opinions of people out there? No. To be honest, I didn’t really expect to, because in all of this, we stand by our favorite literature just like other art forms. Maybe I just wanted to piss some people off. Maybe I just wanted to write out my frustration. But why put it on facebook? I have an innate desire to be noticed, but I also desire so badly for people to understand.
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